By Chris Udochukwu
Pastor Reno Omokri, the Media Aide to former President Goodluck Jonathan has reacted to the desperate economic difficulties facing Nigeria, saying that Nigeria is doing too much for the rich and middle class.
Reno who revealed this via his X account @renoomokri (formerly called Twitter), listed desperate steps he would take to salvage the economy.
The self-acclaimed “TableShaker’ stated that to be an effective Nigerian leader, you must be willing to be as wicked as Abacha while smiling like Babangida.
The former Aide who said desperate times call for desperate remedies. said as follows:
“If you have more than two cars and you are complaining about the cost of fuel in Nigeria, you should thank God it is Tinubu who is President, not me. If I were President of Nigeria, anybody with more than one car would pay times five purchase tax on the second car and must have a certificate for that car mandating them to pay double road use tax.Following that, EFCC will audit your account and ensure you have been paying tax. If you have a private jet, be prepared to pay tax through your nose.”
“I will ensure that the EFCC has more forensic accountants and auditors than uniformed or plain clothes policemen. Every business will be audited. If you flex on social media, you will be audited. Nigeria won’t have a problem with you as long as you pay tax.”
“Nigeria is doing too much for the rich and middle class. We need to double the tax on first-class and business-class tickets ⁵ to and from Nigeria. Anybody bringing luxury goods into Nigeria, whether Gucci shoes, Balenciaga shirt, Armani Suit, or Ray-Ban glasses, must pay a 30% duty, or I will empower Nigeria Customs Service officers to strip you naked right at Murtala International Airport!
“If you want to wear human and bone straight hair, I don’t care as long as you pay bone straight tax. If you don’t, straight to Kirikiri for tax evasion. You can’t be paying tasere tax and be wearing $500 hair and having $10,000 Brazilian Butt Lift. Olorunmaje!
“And anybody that wants an international passport must show tax clearance for the last five years. No tax clearance, no japa. And if you produce a fake one, you are banned from travelling for the next ten years.
:Also, if you trained as a medical doctor at a public university, you must work in Nigeria for five years before you can japa. If you want to japa before five years, then you pay the cost of subsidising your education. After you pay, you can go your way, and Nigeria goes its way. We cannot give you affordable education only for you to use it in a country whose taxpayers did not pay for your subsidised education. You pay, or you stay!
“Finally, Nigeria ought to make it a criminal offence for anybody to sell any foreign product in Nigeria without a tax certificate and give any military or paramilitary official the right to seize any goods that are being sold anywhere if the vendor cannot show on demand proof that import duties were paid for the product he is selling.”
“Woe betide any hotel or restaurant serving foreign rice, beans, or other grains and legumes that can be grown in Nigeria. When you see my wickedness to you, you will shiver when you hear my name!
“The government’s eye must be red for money. Any church or mosque that is collecting tithes and offerings must pay tax. I don’t care. Give me money, my friend!!! Let me explain myself to God. That is not your business. We need to build infrastructure!
“Nigeria is facing desperate economic difficulties. And desperate times call for desperate remedies. President Tinubu is too nice. He ought to have stopped the National Assembly from buying those foreign SUVs. To be an effective Nigerian leader, you must be willing to be as wicked as Abacha while smiling like Babangida.”
“Pray for someone like me not to be your President!” He added.
